HOW DO I SUBMIT IN LOVE TO MY GODLY HUSBAND?

Hey Guys! Today I will be teaching the women how to submit in love to that man of God to learn to love as God intended. You can catch the last teaching of this series here.

So let’s get started!

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Ephesians 5:22 (NIV)

22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.

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1.    Do you know how to submit to God?  As a woman of God you first have to know how to submit to God before you can learn how to submit to your husband-so are you learning to trust God through the tests as a woman in waiting? Are you allowing your mindset to mature in Him? Are you applying His Word into your life? This means learning when to be quiet, learning when to speak, learning how to love, learning who to allow yourself to be connected to romantically and physically-this is the reality of submission and surrender. You cannot submit to your husband if you do not know how to submit to the LORD. It is through our relationship with God we learn how to serve the men in our lives by the help and leadership of His Spirit. So how can He lead you if you don’t know how to follow Him? 

2.    Submission teaches service: The second point here is so powerful-in your submission to God, you learn how to serve your husband. You learn how to pray over your family and your household. You learn how to speak to your husband. The LORD teaches you about your man’s issues, struggles and areas of strength. The LORD speaks to you about what your man of God is facing and uses you to strengthen your husband because remember-you are his rib. (Genesis 2:22).This is the power of submission and surrender to God.

3.    Do you recognize your role as a wife?

Do you know you are a wife? This means you have to start applying that mindset now. Do you know though you may be single in the flesh you may be called to marriage in the spirit? This means from now you start learning how to carry yourself as a wife-no girlfriend or sidechick mentality. This also means you protect your purity. You cover yourself spiritually-you grow prayerfully. You learn and prepare yourself for your husband and even if you are in marriage you approach situations as a couple-because you are now a unit. Don’t fight against your husband-fight beside him. This is what it means to be a wife-the way the world defines it is different from the way God defines it-what the world sees as deal breakers-does not exist in the word of God. So let your union be sealed in Christ. This also means let God approve your marriage before you give it to anyone else-one with God is a majority. If God has called you to be married to His son-you take that responsibility and that calling seriously and you let Him teach you how to submit to your husband.

4.    Learn to submit yourself: You need to know how to submit yourself. This means you alone have that choice. Not your family, not your friends-you. In other words you need to learn woman of God that you have to choose the spirit over the flesh because the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak when your man snaps at you-the spirit is willing but your flesh is weak when your man refuses to open up to you. As long as that man is of God and called by God to be for you, you need to learn to submit yourself-this is how you fight through the power of submission. You approach the situation from a different direction-a God led direction-which means a purposeful direction that yields results. And this is your choice-I emphasize this because your friends and family may advise you rightly or wrongly but at the end of the day they are not married to your husband, they do not share a bed with your husband, they are not courting your husband, they are not spending time with your soon to be husband/husband-you are. So you need to learn to submit yourself by choosing the spirit over the flesh every single time and watch how God changes your perspective on your marriage/courtship.

5.    Finally submit to your own husband: This seems obvious but what does this mean? It means don’t go comparing your man to another woman’s husband/boyfriend. Don’t go complaining about your husband to everyone that would listen-he is your own husband. This means it is personal not public-it is between you both and not for the whole world. So women we must learn to cultivate the spirit of silence-a gentle and quiet spirit. (1 Peter 3:4). Learn to take your affairs concerning your husband/courtship to God because remember our reference here is God-submit to your own husbands as you do to the LORD.  This is what this means-so take that concern to the LORD and watch Him work on you and your own husband. This also shows us that marriage in Christ is not the same as marriage from the world’s perspective. Marriage in Christ encourages you to run your own race-don’t get distracted because your friend’s husband/boyfriend bought her a car, or some amazing gift or took her to some fancy restaurant-stay focused on your marriage-look at your own husband and learn to be thankful for him and to submit to him as unto God-face your race in Christ. (Phil. 3:14).

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How do you think you can apply these tips to your love life?

Check out our free Facebook Group here to learn how to love the way God intended!

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ARE YOU SURE HE IS THE ONE FOR YOU?

Hey Guys! Check out my audio on knowing if He Is The One God Has For You!

You can follow me on soundcloud for more audio here

So guys-what do you think? What other aspects can help you decide if he is the one for you?

Let me know in the comments!

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5 QUICK WAYS TO KNOW YOU ARE IN A GODLY RELATIONSHIP

Hey Guys! Last week we started the Godly Dating series and also discussed it over on Youtube.

Today we are delving deeper in Scripture:

Ephesians 5:25-30 (NIV)

 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

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1.    Purity:  Does he add to your purity? In other words, does he teach you more about Christ? Does he encourage you to walk with the LORD? Does he feed you scripture? These are important questions you need to ask yourself-or is he more concerned about your body? Is he more concentrated on your physical appearance than your spiritual health? Does he even mention the Bible? Is this man interested in the Word at all because he cannot wash you with the Word if he does not understand the Word. Also notice Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her-this means this man shows you through his actions how he feels about you-does he give you his time? His attention? These are questions to help you determine if this man is preserving your purity or poisoning it.

2.    Holy: Christ cleansed and gave himself for the church to make her holy. He gave to heal-so does he hurt you emotionally or even physically?  Husbands are told to cleanse her by the washing with water through the Word-so does he cleanse you? To cleanse is to make something thoroughly clean and rid the body of toxic or unhealthy substances-this means this man should purge you of anything that is not of God in you-so does the Spirit of God move through him to convict you as you walk with God? Does he give you a godly perspective on issues such as how you dress, talk, your relationship? Does he cover you in prayer? These are questions to show if he is cleansing you i.e purifying you through the washing with the Word-because the Word is alive and active (Hebrews 4:12) and it speaks the Truth-it is the Sword of the Spirit (Ephesians 6:17)-so does this man apply the Word into your situation or are you the one constantly trying to get him to do this? Are you the one constantly pushing him into church or to observe godly principles?

3.    Glow: Does he add to your godly glow? The Word says those who look to Him are radiant (Psalm 34:5). Moses also had a radiant face after speaking to God (Exodus 34:29).

So when God is in the relationship, you should be radiating with His presence. So are you radiant? Do you have chaos or peace? Does he make you feel the presence of God? Are you edified through your relationship? To be radiant is to send out light from within-to shine brightly. So do you feel empty or full of God through this relationship?

This is how you will know whether God is there or not. This is also why Christ presented to Himself a radiant church because whenever God is present, Christ is there and you should be radiating as a result of the relationship.

4.    No Stains, No Wrinkles: This is important because here husbands are told to present their wives without stain or wrinkle-now a stain is to make something dirty-to soil it. Does he make you feel dirty? Does he appeal to your flesh or your spirit?  Does he treat you disrespectfully? The only way to present something without wrinkle is if it is handled with care-so does he handle you with care? Does he make you feel unworthy? Does he give you time and attention-does he injure your emotions or does he protect them? Does he speak with wisdom to encourage you or to hurt you? These are ways to identify if he is staining or wrinkling you rather than making you holy and blameless. Now to be blameless is to be innocent this means he should add to your identity as a child of God he should not take from it (Romans 8:14). This also means you need to assess whether the relationship is compromising your identity in Christ or not-for instance, are you always fighting off sexual advances? Or are you spending time together in God’s presence? Does he encourage you to speak to God? Do you pray together and for one another or does he try to get you to dress provocatively? This is how you will determine whether he is presenting you to himself without stain or wrinkle or not and this is very important because how he presents you to himself is a reflection of how he sees himself and ultimately how he identifies himself.

5.    Presentation: The Word says you should be presented to him holy and blameless-in other words it is this man’s responsibility as he washes you with the water of the Word i.e as he draws you closer to Christ through your relationship to help you to preserve your purity in Christ during courtship.  How he treats you is how he sees himself-this is why the Word says he presents her to himself and that husbands ought to love wives as their own bodies. So how does this man present you to himself? Is he always demeaning you? Is he always withholding from you? Does he lack trust? Or is he truthful with you? Does he encourage you in Christ? Is he a blessing to you because he who loves his wife loves himself. How he treats you will show you who he belongs to. If he does not handle you with care, if he does not present you to himself as a radiant church, if he does not love you-chances are he does not love himself-as the Word says husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. The reference to body here is that he should see you as part of him-he should care for you deeply-this is the love we have and can attain through Christ.

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IS HE THE ONE FOR YOU?

Hey Guys!

For the next couple of weeks both here and on my Youtube Channel, I will be discussing godly dating, being a woman of God, a man of God and much more!

Should be interesting right? Let me know your suggestions below on what you would like to be discussed about godly dating.

Today we are going to help you answer if he is the one for you!

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The passage is taken from Ephesians 5:25 (NIV).

Ephesians 5:25 (NIV):

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

1.    Does he love you scripturally? (Ephesians 5:25). Here we are told husbands should love their wives as Christ loved the church-this means that the way that man of God loves you should bless your spirit. He should not ask you to compromise your purity neither should he treat you in a lustful manner i.e asking you to be sexually active before marriage.

2.    Does he know Christ? (Ephesians 5:25). This should actually be the first point but I want to make sure you guys are following a sequence. My point here is that man of God should be able to teach you about Jesus Christ-not the other way around. Think about it for a second-how will he love you like Christ loved the church if he doesn’t know Christ personally? It’s not possible. So ask yourself-does he know Christ?

3.    Is that man selfish? (Ephesians 5:25). He should be selfless. For instance does he seek for you to gratify him sexually even though you are not married? Does he make excuses for you to compromise your purity? Does he act like you are being selfish whenever you talk to him about your Christian standards? Does he go out of his way to show you he cares? Let’s be honest here-if he is not doing any of this he is not selfless-he is selfish-and a man of God is selfless because Christ gave himself up for the church. So does that man do the giving or the taking? Think-does he take your peace, does he take from your understanding of Christ rather than adding to your peace, and adding to your understanding of Christ?

4.    Does he love you as a wife? (Ephesians 5:25). Courtship is in preparation for marriage and so that man of God should already be speaking to your spirit as a wife-you should be able to recognize him as a husband-a man that is led by God and walking in his salvation-does he remind you of Christian values in his actions, his responses? What is his approach to marriage? Soes he avoid that subject entirely or become very quiet and uncomfortable when you broach the subject? Does he love you like a wife should be loved? In other words, does he seek to build your spirit and add strength to your soul?

5.    Does he remind you of Christ? (Ephesians 5:25). Hear me out here-I don’t mean you should idolize your husband or that man because that is not of God! What I mean is does he remind you of Christian values? The Word says husbands should love their wives just as Christ loved the church-hence he should model the love of Christ for the church-he should be a reflection of it. And to do that he has to have Christian values. Does his approach to certain subjects and topics remind you of worldly men rather than godly men? Does he add knowledge to your spirit? Or does he seek to compromise your purity? How does he handle anger and delicate situations? How does he treat others?

These are some questions you should seriously think about if you are looking for a mate-does that man answer all these questions in the positive or negative? Then you have your answer if he is a man after your heart before God or not.

What are your thoughts on how to know he is the one for you?

Check out my Youtube channel for the next couple of weeks as we will be discussing this more and more over the next few episodes both there and on here.

God Bless!

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