1.
The
start determines the seed. What seed are you sowing at the beginning? That will
determine and dictate what fruit is produced in your relationship. Did you
start with an emotional connection or a physical one? This is an example of an
important point that determines the trajectory your relationship faces and the
level of respect that is allowed to breathe in that environment.
2.
Your
actions should echo your words. What have you promised to do? What do you stand
for in the relationship? Are you stating your need for respect but becoming
silent in the face of consistent disrespect? Then don’t be surprised if you are
treated according to your actions and not your words. You need to align your
actions with your words. If you stand up against disrespect in your actions,
there will be no need to even state it in your words because your position is
echoed through your personality.
3.
Reflect
what you expect. You want to be
respected-so respect your partner. Show them you care through actions
that affirm a position of trust and consistency-these echo respect in your
steps-and you will notice that if they are indeed responsive to your position,
they will change the way they engage with you in interaction.
4.
Forgive
past experiences. You cannot move forward in your conversation with your
partner if you stay stuck on your past communications. Forgive any past
incidences of disrespect and clarify your new position and lay a new
foundation. Fair enough, it might not be easy, but if both parties are willing
to commit to a position of nourishment through consistent interactions and
communications based on actions not
words, there will be change in how you perceive one another because your environment will reflect this new
foundation and create a renewed climate for your union.
5.
Represent your relationship respectfully.
Don’t encourage disrespect of your partner outside his/her presence. And don’t entertain disrespect towards your relationship. This will affect the relationship because remember whatever you feed that fruit is whatever it will produce. And poisonous whispers about your partner creates an unstable foundation because you have infected how others view them and this in itself changes how they view you-but if you stand together in public as you do in private, it creates a respect not only towards yourselves but towards your relationship and enables it to grow in strength.
Don’t encourage disrespect of your partner outside his/her presence. And don’t entertain disrespect towards your relationship. This will affect the relationship because remember whatever you feed that fruit is whatever it will produce. And poisonous whispers about your partner creates an unstable foundation because you have infected how others view them and this in itself changes how they view you-but if you stand together in public as you do in private, it creates a respect not only towards yourselves but towards your relationship and enables it to grow in strength.
These are steps I
believe are easily applied to be able to move to that space of respect in your
relationship.
Q: Are you committed to your relationship?
Tip: If the answer is yes, these steps should be
easily applicable because even if you don’t feel like it-your commitment will
make you do it! Still angry about how your partner handled that situation?
Focus on your commitment and let that determine your interaction with them.
This will channel a new energy into your communication-an energy that speaks
from a position of respect not
resentment.
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God Bless,
Tolu.