Genesis 2:18: (NIV)
18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for
the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”
Personally,
singleness is an area I feel is struggled with in the body of Christ. How many
of you can identify with feelings of loneliness, dealing with depressing thoughts
and isolation? These feelings are normal but there are steps and strategies to
dealing with such emotions.
It
is key to understand, as children of the LORD, we are called to be set apart
and there are ways to combat these intermittent spells in your singleness.
I
walk you through four applicable steps to embracing your season of singleness!
1. ACCEPT
YOURSELF
Embrace
your individuality. The LORD said it is
not good for man to be alone and to be alone means to be separate. So first you must become comfortable with being separate before you are ready to step into
your next season of being married!
Granted
you will deal with feelings of intermittent frustration, and anxiety, and even
confusion-but it is important to fight these thoughts in prayer-remember the
Word says we are not given a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a sound
mind ( 2 Timothy 1:7).
When
you begin to spend time with the LORD and yourself, He gives you an
understanding of your identity in Him that will enable you to embrace the
wholeness that comes only from His presence. And when you recognize your
identity as a child of God, you realize you are worth the wait-allow the Spirit
to lead you to this place (Romans 8:14).
2. EMBRACE
YOUR SEASON
According
to Genesis 2:18, the LORD will make a
suitable helper. Let’s concentrate on the word: make. To make is to form. And
in order to be formed you need to be put in a place of pressure. This is
when you face challenges you are going through: having issues at your job, with
that friend, that co-worker, that assignment? It is an opportunity to be built. Allow the LORD to use those
situations to speak to your spirit and lead you-this is how we become more and
more like Him and less like the world (John 3:30). Yield yourself to the
leadership of the Spirit so He can use these experiences to teach you how to
grow in the fruits of His personality (Galatians 5:22-23). This process is not fun but it is fruitful in order to be able to grow as a person and as a child of
God.
3. BE
PRODUCTIVE
It
is important to realize, the power of being productive in your singleness. When
you are a single woman, your body and spirit is devoted unto the LORD (1
Corinthians 7:34). Once you embrace your seasons, you submit to His will. Hence, the fruits of the Spirit begin to
speak into your life, and He leads you into areas where you will bear fruit as
you yield to Him. Here, you become more mature in the Word, because you begin
to learn from obedience what it means to
sacrifice time, energy, effort, and even frustration, indignation etc as
unto the LORD. This is when you begin to embody the traits of a helper. A helper by definition is
someone who provides help to someone else. This is when the gifts of the LORD
will start to speak through you-in a whisper, a thought; He could lead you to
start a small business, or to even start teaching, or go travelling or take a
course-the possibilities are limitless and there is ample time in this season
to be of service in body and spirit to the LORD.
4. PURPOSE
Now
that you have embraced your identity, yielded to the Spirit through your
seasons of experiences, and become productive through your obedience to the
LORD, you will notice you have begun to move in purpose. And purpose is made
complete in Christ-your identity shifts from being stationary to being mobile
in the kingdom. What happens through this transition is you become a helper to
people through your personality, your position, your productivity and
eventually to your spouse through these various experiences. You will mature
and begin to focus less on the things of the flesh like worrying about the
timing when you will meet your mate, and begin to understand what it is to live by faith and not by sight (2
Corinthians 5:7); by the Spirit and not
the flesh. (Galatians 5:25).
These
four steps will enable you to move from a mindset of frustration to a place of
fruition!
Allow
yourself to be used in your season of singleness to serve in the LORD’s Kingdom.
As you move from an understanding of your identity through Him, yield to Him by
embracing your experiences, and become productive in the place of obedience,
you will have stepped on the field of purpose, a suitable helper-built through this journey to serve as unto the
LORD in your marital ministry and beyond!
Tip: Singles, start walking out your purpose step by step day by day and when the seasons change, the right steps will join you on the journey.
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